Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Seriously serious, so serious.

January 19th. Resolutions are on the brink. The expanse of the calendar seems daunting. The stomach is rumbling. I missed my diet meeting and personal training session on Friday....

I'm managing. How are you holding up?! 

It's time to buckle down. No more Mrs. Nice Girl. Time to get seriously serious about what I've actually verbalized as my next goal weight - 165lbs. It's just a number, but let's wrap it in some sobering context, shall we?

165 is a number that I cannot remember ever seeing on a scale. I am sure that at some point in high school I clocked in at 165. I am sure there was a day in my sophomore year, as I hit my peak of swimming long distance freestyle that my body was lean and the scale read 165. I was unaware of it - and frankly, at that time, it wouldn't have been an achievement in our locker room. I was always a big girl - "broad", "chubby", "thick", "plus" or as the more nuanced websites "fluffy". I"m sorry, how is fluffy ever a word used to describe a woman?! I mean, seriously............. fluffy? How about "Rubenesque"? Way more conversationally acceptable and less internet-cat-video lingo.

165 is 10 lbs lower than my goal weight in 2011.

165 is not obese. It is not thick. It is not fluffy.

It is healthy and average and not at all plus-sized in any way.

165 might be a size 8. I don't even know! 165 might be a bikini.

165 won't be happiness, but it will be the visual of perseverance, dedication, self control and good old-fashioned sweat.

165 is seriously serious in every way. 

I'll do it. I"ll do it cause I have said that I will. That's usually how I roll. But one thing I"ll have to get serious about is not letting a roll touch my lips. I've got to cut out the "bites" - the noshing of snacks, the rationalization of deserving it, the extra 300 calories here or there. I've been at 180 for 3 months. No more wine. No more wine. No more wine. No more whine!


It's time to shake the snow globe. I'm too comfortable. Are you?

2 comments:

Leslie said...

Just wanted to say I'm a fellow New Directions girl and I am cheering you on! The holiday season was challenging for me, for sure. I am starting to pull out of a little of a plateau - stuck in the 180's/upper 170's from early Dec. on, but now starting to see some better weights.

Leslie said...

Just wanted to say I'm a fellow New Directions girl and I am cheering you on! The holiday season was challenging for me, for sure. I am starting to pull out of a little of a plateau - stuck in the 180's/upper 170's from early Dec. on, but now starting to see some better weights.