Monday, December 17, 2012

Week 1 - Living, Loving and Praying

From my blog reel, I note that today is the National Blogging Day of Remembrance. In lieu of blogging it is suggested that you step away from the computer and spend a special moment with the ones that you love in honor of the victim of the Newton tragedy. While I think that it is a nice sentiment, I'd like to think that my blog never prevents me from living, loving and praying. I need to purge these thoughts, so here goes:

I didn't intend this blog to be about Friday's events. So I will say what I did on Facebook: There is real honest-to-God evil in the world. We get lulled into a false sense of security, a decidedly first world problem. We don't see horrific death every day. We are lucky. But evil is real, and no matter whether we live in a self made prison or an open and free society, it is here. The fear that I feel after Friday is so foreign to me that the only thing I can equate it to is that feeling I had after 9/11. When all of the taken-for-granted security of my life was in question. Things I never considered crossed my mind on 9/11. I would be lying now, if I denied that I am similarly shaken to the core on Friday. Things I never considered are crossing my mind. And I'm scared.

And so, I'll pray. I'll pray for the souls of those that are lost. I will pray for peace for the families, for the school, for the town. I'll pray for the family of the shooter. I'll pray for healing, forgiveness and strength. I'll pray that God will carry them through this dark valley.

Similarly, I will pray for our country. I pray for healing and understanding. I pray that despite this moment of seeming vulnerability that we don't give up the basic human rights and freedoms that Americans enjoy. I pray that in searching for answers we don't over reach causing even more fundamental problems as a result. I pray for our President, for our senators and our representatives.

I personally pray for peace in my own heart. Friday morning, while the events unfolded in Newton, I was visiting the public elementary school down the street. Discussing the classrooms with a contact there, learning about their programs, their gifted classes, how public schools work in Arizona. I walked out feeling unsure about where we would send XJ next fall and turned on the radio. Heard the news. Cried. I don't want to let my babies grow up. Go out into the world where we know they will experience challenges, temptations, heartbreak and terror. No Mom wants their kids to knows the darkness that lives in our midst. I pray for peace in our family and in yours.

So, today, I am living, loving and praying. My mind and emotions are a jumble. I admit that I am small in the world for the things that I can control. There is so much that is beyond me and for that I ask God to reveal His plan. Show me how I can do His will. I will strive to do it.

Things I can control. I'm taking back a bit of it.

Weight loss this week: 2 lbs
Total weight loss: 2 lbs (since 12/16/12)
Weight until Goal: 23 lbs

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

A Poorly Timed Decision to Get Back in the Game

Are you on top of your game? Beating your PRs and rocking the house? Congrats!

Or are you like me, thinking wistfully of the days when all the clothes fit fabulously and you could easily wave your hands no to the decadent brownies being passed around the table? Sound familiar?

Yeah. It is hard. Facing the truth. Mustering up some courage.

Every muscle in my body is yelling at me: "What the hell Eddy? We were just getting relaxed and comfy and we are doing WHAT?"

That's right body, we are. We are DOING. We are doing:

Push ups.
Jumping Jacks and maybe even a jog....

So no more sitting around. I'm getting back in the game. I'm on Day 3 of what I am quietly thinking of as my "come back". It hurts. Like, literally hurts. But I've got to remember I CAN do this. I have DONE this. And I can do it AGAIN.

I've got a little personal motivation for 2014. There is this pesky half marathon that I signed up for...

Goal 1. (Writing it down! Saying it out loud! EEK!)

Lose 25 lbs by May 1. (For curious minds, this will put me back to a happy maintainable place)

As last time, I've picked Monday as my weight in day, which is just dumb. But whatever. It works for me.

I'll be back...... 

Monday, December 3, 2012

Peace! Joy! Love!

Hugging a little tighter. 

Loving a little longer.

Merry Christmas to our friends near and far. 

May the joy of Jesus Christ be with you now and always. 

Monday, November 12, 2012


I surrender. I've fought. I've been in denial. I've looked in the mirror and seen my 25 year old self. Not any more. It is time to admit: I've reached adulthood.

It hasn't come easily.

It would be simple to say that I felt entitled to the good things in life. I was blessed to attend a very good college preparatory school. I was exposed to money. I was blessed to study abroad at a British girls school. I was exposed to money. I was talented enough to gain admission to a good liberal arts university on the east coast. I got need based loans and a work study job, but lots more folks had money. I got a job. I got a car. I got a condo.I relocated. I bought another house. I bought another car. I bought stuff. I got married. Etc. Etc. Etc. 

Turns out, I didn't really have any money. I had created a life based on an idea of what I thought I was entitled to as a person who came from a certain place with a certain education and a certain lifestyle. I was reared to know and love and give the glory to God, but I wasn't doing that. I was just existing in accordance to what society would have of me as a well educated upper-middle class white female. I arrived at 35 with all the trappings of a "successful" life. A salary. Benefits. Vacations. Cars. Houses. Clothes. Jewelry. Shoes. Yadda. Yadda. Yadda.

Excuse me if I want to be more than my demographic.

I'm pretty sure that somewhere around the age of 35 you sort of stop and realize how much you've been scrambling to get up to the top of the heap --- only to realize, that perhaps this isn't the place you wanted to be after all.

And even worse, when I got here, I had no plan where to go next.

In the past two months, I think Hubs and I have come to grasp our adulthood. We've taken a good hard look at where we are. We've done really adult and boring things like budgeting, updating our estate plans, buying life insurance, paying off debt, saving money.

But more excitingly, we've dreamed about where we want to be - and we have a plan to make it reality. I can't even tell you how awesome it is to have a life plan. We have plans. We have goals. We've figured out a way to make it happen. A plan to clear ourselves of the trappings of what I thought we were entitled and to build a life, a family, a future, a legacy for us and our kids. The plan is written down and we are ready to grow into our adulthood peacefully and without any more regrets. It isn't going to be easy but it turns out adulthood isn't easy.

Who knew adulthood was going to be so rewarding? 

Thursday, November 8, 2012


To say that this post has been festering and rotting ("fester fester fester, rot, rot, rot") in my brain for a while now is an understatement. I've pretty much had this blog post on the tip of my tongue for months. Sometimes the hardest, truest words, are the words we know in our hearts but seem unable to say.

One simple little word. It has become a sadness and a joy. It is both good and bad. In my mind right now, it conjures up a whole range of emotions.

The obvious: The move to Arizona was hard on me. The physical change. The climate change. The impact to the fitness goals I had set this year. All of it was overwhelming and not all bad. The move brought my family closer to my sister's family. I have kids who know and see their cousins all the time. The move changed the focus of our family. The change of our work habits, our budget, our house, our schedule. It was a juggling  that I didn't adapt to so well. I lost myself in it. I didn't feel like myself. I did know how to forgive myself when things became harder than they've been. I didn't know how to focus or what to say. So, I didn't. Say anything.

"All experience is an arch wherethrough gleams that untraveled world whose margin fades for ever and for ever when I move. " - Alfred Lord Tennyson


The mental move: another hard one. In very much the same way I looked in the mirror in 2010 and said: "Screw it, I'm tired of being fat.", today I say, "Screw it. I'm tired of not being myself." I've let fear creep back into my life. It isn't hard to see. It has been slapped all over Facebook for the past 3 months. Fear of what I'm seeing on the news. Fear of the safety issues that are unknown to us, fear of things I cannot control. Fear of the political battles in this country and the potential impact of those issues to me, my family and my children. Fear of losing my freedom. I can't do it anymore. It is exhausting and it is not me. I've struggled with whether to cut ties to old friends. I've struggled over whether to withdraw.  I've struggled with whether to embrace my inner hippie. I've struggled with whether to continue speak up or shut up (yes, folks, I actually do try to hold my tongue).

"All mankind is divided into three classes: those that are immovable, those that are movable and those that move." - Benjamin Franklin

The spiritual move. I'm exhausted. I want peace. A couple months back, Erik & I signed up to do Financial Peace University. We've started (and not finished) the Dave Ramsey plan before. We have good intentions, and dive all in, but tend not to stay all in. We bounce from thing to thing with a fair degree of ease, neither of us wanting to prevent the other from opportunity or happiness. Both of us, (I hope), would say very quickly that we have a good marriage. We do. But, going to this class has forced us to look in the mirror. How good is our marriage, really, if we've never actually gotten real about our hopes and dreams? The legacy we want to leave our kids? The dreams we have about how and where and when to spend our working days and ultimately our retirement. How does God fit into our lives? Our marriage? Our goals?

These a big hefty questions that move you. They are the kid of questions that you stay up late mulling over in bed. They are the kinds of discussions that we didn't have before we got married but I'm so glad we are having them now. Moving together, I am addressing my fears, opening the Bible, and seeking knowledge. Together we now have a vision of what we want our lives and our family to be about. They've moved me to accept those things that I cannot change and move on to those that I can.

"If you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove." - Timothy Leary

Friday, August 24, 2012

Be Still and Run.

Last weekend, I joined my sister and my mother at a women's church retreat in Carefree AZ. Given that it was a women's retreat, the topic (predictably... what theme would a men's retreat have?) focused on giving your worries to God, having faith, rejoicing in our female friendships, and finding peace in our hectic and expectation-filled lives.

In other words, "Be still and know that I am God!" -- Psalm 46:10

Our retreat included song, reflection, prayer, fellowship and questioning. I had time to think back about a lot of things in my life that have been buried by more recent  things.... times when I felt God's presence, times when I felt peace, times when I felt wholly whole and full of the Holy Spirit.

You don't have to be be Christian to have these times. Many of the times I felt the nearest to God, I was the farthest from the Church. But I digress... (another topic, another blog post).

We asked ourselves: When was the last time you were truly still? What does it take for you to be still?

As per usual, Eddy is totally backwards on this point. When am I the most 'still'? When I am the most active.

I have found more moments of silence, peace and awe while I was running. For me, I have to take all that energy.. energy that is usually destructive.. anxiety eating away at my confidence... and pour it out, so that nothing is left to think about. I literally have to run myself into exhaustion. And in that moment, I can let go. Give up the control. Give up the worry. It is yours God. Take it. I've got nothing left.

I envy those who can find stillness without acting like a crazy person. 

I wish I could meditate myself into stillness.

I wish I could pray myself into stillness.

I wish I could work myself into stillness.

I wish I could....

And right now, I'm even struggling to run myself into stillness. I haven't found stillness in a while and it is starting to show.

I'm going to try to meditate...

try to pray...

try to work...

try to run...

I'm not going to fight for control. I'm going to let it go. Take it God, I'm yours.  I want to be still. Be still and run.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Free Half Marathon

I'm in! I've registered with the lottery invitation code I received for the FREE HALF MARATHON. That's right folks, 13.1 will be mine. Again. It will be official this time.

Which means, I have a year and a half to figure out how to run in the desert. I think that's about enough time. Cacti, I'm coming for you.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Case of the Mondays

Starting over. Again. It's Monday. Last nite, in the fog of my sunday nite sleepiness I declared to Dear Hubby:

"The sugar detox starts tomorrow."

"WHAT?! I didn't get any notice."

"Not your problem. You can still eat whatever. The only one who is responsible for what passes these lips is me."

And so it begins, again. I'm coming off an emotionally trying week. A lot of things happened that I didn't handle very well and most of all, I'm mad at myself. I left my emotional swings get the best of me, and I turned to the thing that never fails me.


The slide in my discipline has been a long time coming. I'll be the first to raise my hand and say that when I was running long and hard in Wisconsin, I realized that I could pretty much eat whatever I wanted and maintain my weight loss.

Fast forward to not running long or terribly hard in Arizona and the lbs started to creep back on.

In the last 2 weeks, I've only run 4 times. I wish I could say that was due to my demanding cross training schedule.

It isn't.

I'm burned. I've fallen back into my old habits and I'm nursing my psyche. Even worse, I have enough self awareness to know exactly what I'm doing and I still can't control myself.

So, it is Monday. I haven't weighed in because I can't face the number. But what I can do is say, that this week, I will do better than last. I'm cutting out the sugar. I'm going to get in at least 3 runs. It isn't heroic, or even tough... its just what I can commit to right now.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Hello My Name is Simon

This Saturday, we fell victim to a classic blunder. Never take kids to a pet store in the mall in a moment of vulnerability. Or else this...

comes home and takes up residence with this family.SUCKERS!

Curious things about Simon Charlie Lewis:

1. He hasn't barked yet, at anything.
2. He has no predatory instincts.
3. He can roll over, play dead and dance for a treat
4. His sign for going outside is pretty much just walking over and looking at you - pretty stealth.
5. He wants to be next to a human, any human, at all times.
6. He gets really tired walking around the block. Not going to help my running career.
7. He runs from shade to shade as if the sun will turn him into jello
8. He pees on concrete
9. He doesn't lift his leg (which combined with #8 means he pees all over his feet)
10. He poops mid walk. I mean really, who needs to stop for such things?
11. He likes to go in the truck and stick his head out the window
12. He tolerates toddler antics.
13. He pretty much completes this goofy bunch. 

Monday, July 2, 2012

Georgia, June, Cool!

First day back to work after my mini-break (it must be true love) with Dearest Husband last week. What a great time.. laying by the pool, reading, running, spa-ing, evenings drinking and canoodling... it was just what this Eddy needed. First vacation without the kiddos since they were born. Deep sigh.

Ah... Stone Mountain... I miss you already....

 Normally it would be hard to come back to Monday morning, but this time, it is not. Today happens to be my 8th Wedding Anniversary - bronze - for marrying THIS guy:

Really, I am so lucky. There was fireworks on our wedding day 8 years ago and thankfully, there still is fireworks today. I'm a lucky girl. And it gets better! This week, my brother is coming into town and we are celebrating my parents 50th Wedding Anniversary! Cool, cool, triple cool!

July is starting out on a high note. What happened in June you ask....

Miles: 61.13
Runs: 18
Hours: 12:00:69
Calories: 7,431

It isn't a 100 mile month, but its 61 miles on the treadmill, in the summer, in the desert. I'm getting faster and still loving my runs. I've come to grips with my new distances and forgiven myself for my over indulgences. I need to get back to the diet but I also have to just keep livin..

Thursday, June 21, 2012

3 Things Thursday - Sore, Summer, Speed

Sore.... there is a tightness in my achilles that I haven't felt since I started running over a year ago. I changed out my sneakers today, ran in my old faithfuls, and that helped. Last week I cranked up my mileage (trying to get back to 20 mile a week base), so that might have something to do with it.

Summer... flying in the face of sore, I pushed myself on the treadmill this morning trying to log a respectable time for my Welcome to Summer Virtual 5K. I don't know what it is about the treadmill that makes speed so much more difficult. I could come up with a whole host of excuses, but lets just leave it as - for me, the treadmill is waaaaay harder than running on the road. So, I"ll take my 31.07 time.

Speed... not sure where you're hiding, but I will find you!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Welcome to Summer Virtual Run

Really, it's still spring? How can that be with temps at 113 today? Ah well ... nothing like a virtual race on the treadmill and a chance at some cool prizes.

Head on over to Running Loving Living and get registered!

Thursday, June 14, 2012

1,000 Mile Photo Shoot

Imagine my surprise.....

 when my lifetime stats popped up on this morning....

Lifetime Stats:

1,002.05 Miles
262 Workouts
209.56 Hours
130,028 Calories 

 and told me that I've run 1,000 miles since I started running in Spring 2011. Wow! Scary!

 That's a long way for a formerly obese gal who couldn't even run after her preschooler in the front yard.... 1,000 miles. That's something. Something to be proud of when I've been beating myself up over not being able to continue my former high mileage training in the heat of the Phoenix summertime. A cool 1,000 miles...

Evidence that I need to get over myself? Remember where I've come from and be proud of where I am?

Ummm. Yeah.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Who can it be now?

(bopping head slightly to retro 80's Men at Work)

Yep. Its me. I'm still here. I swear. I promise.

May has come and gone and with it slips another iota of my motivation....

May Retrospective:

64 Miles
14.38 Hours
20 Runs
7,474 Calories Burned

And in even more sobering news...... I have a physical tomorrow. Dum, dum dum dum....

I suspect that tomorrow, oh, at say 10am MT, reality will come crashing down around me. In the meantime, I will groove silently to the 80's soundtrack in my head and enjoy the little munchkin dancers in their finery:

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Three Things Thursday - DMB Edition

My three things came to me very clearly during my post lunch DMB 'mill time... an easy 3M jog..

1. I eat too much.

2. I drink too much.

3. .... too much!

Monday, May 21, 2012

I'm sweaty and I know it.

Sometimes actually admitting it, whatever it might be, is the final, not the first, step. Just saying the words cleanses your psyche allowing you to push through, to push beyond. I think my "its ok to struggle" epiphany last week was one such moment. I can't allow myself to get all "Eddy pity party", I've got to just find a new mantra - like the one that came to me as I labored on the treadmill this morning:

I love sweat. I love sweat. I love sweat.

See, honestly, I really don't. I hate sweating. It is just gross and slippery and stinking and sorta counter to all things I'd like to be - polished, coiffed, presentable, cool, aloof. It's like singing, "I'm sweaty and I know it", when you'd just rather be "sexy". I mean really, when faced with sweaty or sexy, I'd take the later.

But this morning, I embraced the sweat. I pushed thru that mental wall that has been growing up in my psyche in the past two months and felt much better for it - sweat and all. In fact, since my struggling blog admission last week, I've had two good sessions on the treadmill where I feel that I got my legs back, if that makes any sense. I felt like I could have kept going for another couple miles on both occasions but for fear of causing more harm, I've been wrapping up my runs around the 3 mile distance for the past few weeks.

Slowly and surely I will turn sweaty to sexy. I love to sweat. I love to sweat. I love to sweat. My new mantra.

Oh, and just cause we all love some rum... why is the rum always gone? I run to drink rum... not that its doing me much good!

Week in Review:

 Count: 5 Activities
 Distance: 17.75 mi
 Time: 3:53:45 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 182 ft
 Avg Speed: 4.6 mph
 Avg HR: 138 bpm
 Calories: 2,192 C

Weigh In: + 1.5 lbs
Weight loss to date: NADA
Weight til goal: 11 lbs

Friday, May 18, 2012

It is Ok to Struggle

I can't locate the source of my anxiety. I can't say that it is________ or _______. It just is. I've been on edge. I'm sad. I'm lonely. I'm just unsure of myself. I've lost my mojo somewhere around here and I can't find it.

Perhaps it is a self fulfilling prophecy. I worried a LOT about what a move to the desert would do for my progress. I should have tackled this with the attitude that it was the ultimate challenge - a total new place to test my fortitude. I think a lot of my anger is that I'm failing to do that.

Instead, I've closed the door. I'm not going out. I'm returned to the comfort of my house, my treadmill, my larger size clothes, my comfort foods, my sweets. I'm frustrated. I'm angry. I'm afraid.

I don't want to go back.

This is all a good reason for why I haven't been blogging.

I don't want to go back.

All I have come up with is this -- it is ok to struggle. It is okay. As long as I keep fighting. Struggle is part of the process. There are going to be ups and downs. I just have to keep trying. I will get thru this and be better for it in the end.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Just say "No!"

I'm working on it, the whole saying "no" thing ....

Week in Review:

Weigh in:
Weight loss this week: .5 lbs
Weight till Goal: 9.5 lbs

 Count: 5 Activities
 Distance: 15.90 mi
 Time: 3:09:58 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 268 ft
 Avg Speed: 5.0 mph
 Avg HR: 154 bpm
 Calories: 1,974 C     

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Lymon Munson 5K - Fire it Up!

I donned my Fire It Up bracelet and jumped on the treadmill this morning. My employer, Fireman's Fund Insurance Company, was encouraging us all to celebrate the life of Lymon Munson.  

Lyman Munson...
...loved learning and sharing his knowledge with others. Accomplished academically and as an outstanding underwriter, Lyman challenged conventional thinking and always shared his knowledge freely. 
...valued the opinions of others and led by example. He believed in the power and responsibility of asking questions and making tough decisions. 
...had a zest for life. He was a passionate runner, who deeply loved his family, community, and greyhound rescue dogs.
...loved root beer and ate chocolate chip cookies, daily.
...believed in One Fireman's Fund -- that our collective whole is greater than the sum of our individual disciplines. 
...will forever be known for the phrase "Fire it up!" Said frequently, and with passion, this statement was Lyman's way of inspiring others to take on challenges and focus on winning. Lyman "Fired it up" each and  every day!

So, Fire it Up today!  Lymon Munson, this 5K is for you! 

Monday, May 7, 2012

It's Monday! See Eddy Run!

Let the calorie counting and weigh ins begin! I've gotten on the scale (first time in months), I've logged back into my calorie counter. I've set up my SmartCoach training plan (less miles since I'm on the treadmill) and I've strapped on my shoes. I've already picked out some new ones as motivation. I've got a plan, run / strength train, repeat X 5. I've got motivation... my  growing stomach.

Time to start over. Time to continue the journey. Time to feel better about myself.

I've done this before. I can do it again. See Eddy Run! My new friend and I will be spending many hours together this summer....

It's May 7th. Lets see how fast I can lose 10 lbs.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

3 Things Thursday - A Retrospective

Feeling a bit nostalgic today, I've taken a look back at what I was doing in May 2011.

1. My RUNiversary. I took it to the streets for the first time in April 2011 and ran my first 20 mile week the first week of May 2011. Pushing too far too soon, I quickly slowed down. Darn Achilles pain! I've been a runner for a year. It has been a life changing year, and even though I am currently in a bit of a slump, I am ever so proud of what I've accomplished.

2. My GARMINiversy. I wasn't far down the road when I "gadgeted up". My brother was in Madtown that weekend and REI was running their annual sale. Eddy picked up the ForeRunner 110 and hasn't left home without it since. I'm not sure what exactly I would do without my Garmin. Yep, I'm one of those runners. Need music, pace, distance, and speed available at all times. These days, just walking the dog, looking at my Garmin is horribly depressing, but I'm still wearing it and it is still motivating me.

3. Size 14. This time last year, I was beeping. I was a size 14. I was celebrating it. I was loving the non-PLUS size clothes shopping. I was proud of my body. I felt strong and capable. May 2012? I'm Size 14, again. This time, I'm feeling flabby and embarrassed. It has everything with how I got to sz 14 again. Last year, I had lost 80 pounds and earned every size of clothing that I dropped. Since losing the 100 lbs, I've gained back a happy 10 lbs and am comfortably back into my 14s. My stint at SZ 12 was like my wedding day---- gorgeous, full of photos, smiles, compliments, celebrations, a whirlwind... and short lived. Back in normal day life, having moments of weakness and struggle, I'm a 14. And that's ok.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Oh Mr. Sun! (April Rewind)

Running came to a quick halt here in the desert when the temps topped out at 105 last week. Add heat to mental burnout and you've got a recipe for some Eddy back tracking. Add a week long head cold and a stressful house hunting trip by my folks to my already increasing depression and you can't blame me for seeking solace in some Ben & Jerry's. Nonetheless, I will forge on. On the agenda this weekend --get thee sister's treadmill to my house!

Accountability baby. Here it is. April Rewind.

 Count: 12 Activities
 Distance: 56.11 mi
 Time: 9:36:21 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 991 ft
 Avg Speed: 5.8 mph
 Avg HR: 144 bpm
 Calories: 5,925 C

I'm committed to getting back at it. I'm allowing the "it" portion of it to be determined. I have in mind to start something different, I just have yet to figure out what it is. I'm not satisfied with my current state and I'm resolved to change it. No more hiatus. Onward and upward. Must embrace the sun not hide from it. 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Incredible X and Transparent P

My Super Giggly Girls

I'm just a slacker

Slacking. Slacker. Slacking Slacker. Eddy is embracing it. I wish I was blissfully unaware that this Saturday is the half marathon that I have registered for in Wisconsin. I'm not. They keep sending me reminders. The facebook group is active and I'm getting notification. Race Day Events is sending emails. My calendars all have the date circled. Well folks, I'm feeling like a dud. I won't be there. I won't be running.

My left hip is channeling all my disappointment and I'm hobbling around like an octogenarian. What did I do to my hip? No clue, except to note that about a half mile into my run yesterday and felt a sharp pain in the outside hip joint that got progressively worse after a day in my desk chair. Hmmm. Feeling...disappointed, fat and old. This is a cheery blog post. Makes an Eddy get all introspective.

Eddy is 3 weeks into life here in Phoenix (perhaps it is all of the above) and the infatuation with my new locale is wearing off. Holding hands with Phoenix has been fun. We've had some good first dates. Our first kiss was sweet. But a couple of weeks in and I'm re-evaluating. Is this good for the long term? Like any good introspection, you can only compare your new love to your old one. My new love is always sunny. Always perky. Always like an umbrella drink. Sure my new love has an allergy problem. He is dusty and fading. His style is drastically different than mine. He had a new culture and some new language. He is busier and has places to go.

Whereas my old love was more balanced. There were snowy days, cloudy days, rainy days, warm days and sunny days. Sometimes he was all four seasons in one day. He was more country less city. His colors were vibrant and consistent, red, green and gold. He was small but trying to be big in an endearing way. There was cuddling on the couch by the fire with hot chocolate. There were days by the pool.  He was comfortable like a favorite pair of jeans. Friendly, like going to Target and always running into someone you know. Predictable. Reliable.

Eddy is not sure where she is going with this... just to say... I miss my old love. I'm still adjusting to this new relationship and it is cool, but if you know me, you know that I tend to idealize former loves.... for me, memories crystallize... usually into something sweeter.

Week in Review:

 Count: 6 Activities
 Distance: 23.94 mi
 Time: 4:32:02 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 455 ft
 Avg Speed: 5.3 mph
 Avg HR: 153 bpm
 Calories: 3,030 C

Thursday, April 12, 2012

3 Things Thursday - Pita Jungle, Drivers License, Retro Looks

1. Pita Jungle. I had the chance to meet up with a fellow Tough Chik (registration reopens in May!) on Tuesday for lunch and I JUMPED at the chance. I've been feeling awfully down about my current state of fitness. No one to blame but myself and a massive sugar addiction - I headed to Scottsdale yearning for some inspiration. Boy, did I get it. Inspiration and a bit of envy as well. This Tough Chik has got it going on... confidence, independence, and travel inducing new job for a cool company. Although we were at different places in our lives and (obviously) different levels of fitness, we had a nice chat as two women out in the world trying to make it happen. I hope we are able to meet up again soon! Oh, and we had lunch at Pita Jungle... thus the Pita Jungle reference. Roar! I am woman (at Pita Jungle) hear me Roar!

2. Drivers License. Trying to get my life in order, I headed off to the Arizona Department of Transportation this week to get my license and my van sorted. I didn't think much about having my picture taken, or replacing my Wisconsin license, so when the gal said to me - "Do you want this old license or should we pitch it?" I stumbled: "Oh, I'll save it for posterity." I'm glad I did. What a documentation of my journey:

3. Its throw back to the 80's here in the Lewis house this week. Daycare is having "Color"' days this week, and we've been dressing accordingly. In an effort to be the super-cool-80's-child that I am, I've been calling on the garments that my Mom saved of mine to keep it all in the family. Here are XJ and Miss P looking all retro hipster in their orange duds. I love the total look of disgusted boredom with my effort to get them to smile/pose.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Not Training (Week 3 Recap)

I miss the rhythm of my prior training life. Seeing as it is Monday, I'm particularly missing the ease of my prior Monday blog titles. Thus, the non-title for the non-training week Monday check in. I'm lacking in creativity this Monday, so this is all I've got...

Not training sucks. Seriously... I know. What gives Eddy? Why can't you get your groove back? It is week 3 of not routinely running. Not checking my Runners World training App to tell me how many miles to log and at what pace. Without thinking about diet and hydration and play lists.

If you haven't noticed. I've just been living.

It is a weird development. This living thing. I've been afraid to just do my own thing for fear of what exactly would happen if left to my own devices. Well, let me tell you. When left to my own devices I tend to eat too much chocolate and drink too much wine. I've run. I've completed 3 events of the Jelly Bean virtual race last week, but I've lost the predictability of my training.

I miss it.... sorta. I miss that innate sense of accomplishment that comes along with completing your training plan but I am enjoying living a little bit of life too. To be reacquainted with Hubs, to have the girls so loving their new jungle-like backyard. Sitting out on our patio in awe of new flora and fauna and new critters. Warm sunshine days slipping into cooler desert evenings. I like that. I'm getting used to it. If I earn back a tad bit of tummy in the process, ya'll will forgive me, right?

This week in review:

 Count: 3 Runs / 1 Bike (13 miles)
 Distance: 23.88 mi
 Time: 3:21:08 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 361 ft
 Avg Speed: 7.1 mph
 Avg HR: 137 bpm
 Calories: 1,873 C

Thursday, April 5, 2012

3 Things Thursday - Grapefruit, Biking, Age

1. Grapefruit. We've got a lot of it and I'm learning to love it. The fruit in our new yard is still a real novelty, and the whole family is enjoying the harvest. Here are our little worker bees singing the praises of grapefruit! Ps. Grapefruit is cool cause it is pink!

2.  I flirted with biking last year. I even took a spin class (yes, just one, but whatever). The most I really ever did was hitch the tot carrier to the back to get all of us down to the Glacier Crossing Pool. Well, faced with my Jelly Bean option of 13.1 half marathon or 21K (13 mile) bike ride in North Phoenix, I chose the later. So I popped on my helmet and took to the streets this morning. I probably should have mapped a route (I didn't). I probably should have brought more accessible water (note to self, buy water bottle attachment thingie). I rode this way and that and watched the miles tick off on the Garmin. It was nice to be without the constant pumping bass of my Pandora station. Just me and the various vehicles that were trying to avoid me. Ah, peace...

3. So, I usually keep it under wraps, but I can't help but mention a little (or big, depending on your view) birthday coming up. Eddy turns 35 on Saturday. That's right folks. 35 years old. Geez, when the heck did that happen? I certainly don't FEEL 35 years old. Especially now, with all the transformation in the past 2 years, I should get a do-over and be able to relive the whole 25-30 era sans 100lbs. Oh the damage that could be done! . . oh wait, that's how I GAINED 100 lbs. I remember now.  So, yeah. No big plans, just a casual acknowledgment of another year of Eddy having come and gone. And just cause I was so darn cute as a kiddo, here's me and my Muffin puppy from 1984. (Wow I look like XJ right here!)

Monday, April 2, 2012

Jelly Bean 10K and March Recap

Ok. I did it. I can still run. I can't believe how much it feels like starting over. I've put on a couple of pounds and a whole lot of doubt in the last 2 weeks. I've committed to doing the Jelly Bean, and this morning, I did. Accomplishment feels good. This is no great time to write home about. And yes, there were moments of walking (acclimation to dry is hard to come by), but 6.2 has been logged at 1:04.13. Funny.. that's a PR. I've never actually run a 10K race before. Small victories but I'll take 'em.

Jelly Bean 10K by agirlcallededdy at Garmin Connect - Details

And my post run mug shot! Very windy today. I tried to capture some of our roses. And well, it looks like the rose likes my nose. 

Looking ahead, I'm very happy to have this month behind me. For the sake of full disclosure, here is my March recap:

March 2012
No.of Runs: 14
Total Miles: 60
Total Time: 4 hours
Total Calories Burn: 8,653

I slipped from my 100 mile a month average but you might have noticed we've had some things going on this month. I'm going to give myself a buy on the whole moving across the country thing. How many months can I use THAT excuse?! ; )

Friday, March 30, 2012

Let Normalcy Resume

We've arrived in the Valley of the Sun. I can't tell you how happy I am that the past two weeks are over. Not that it is normal yet, but I'm ready for normalcy to resume. We've packed. We've cleaned. We've said goodbyes. We've flown. We've driven. We've eaten more fast food in the past 2 weeks that in the past two years. We've met new friends. We've gone to new daycare, church and grocery stores. We've been to Target every day. We've got tired feet. We've tried to run in the sun. We've realized what the priorities are in life.

The house is great, thanks to the help of my sister and her family. Not only did they put me and girls up for over a week while the household was in transit, but upon arrival, they attacked my boxes with fervor and made my house a home. I'm still entirely distracted and needing some time to get my bearings, but I'm finally coming around to seeing the sun on a daily basis. Not a bad front yard, eh?

As for running. I'm finding it challenging and a bit overwhelming right now. It is so freakin DRY here. A mile and a half in and I feel like my mouth and sinuses are coated in dust. Bleh! Now that my handheld is here, I'm anxious to tackle more. I'm certainly feeling totally apart from the mileage I was logging this time last month. My 2.8 miles this morning felt like a good 8 at least. I'm thinking I'm going to have to revamp my goals down here for the next few months, and see where I am come fall. I don't know... ask me again in a week.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

3 Things Thursday- Final Days, Doubt, What to Wear?

1. Final Days

Today is the final day that Eddy is home alone. Hubs will arrive tonight at midnight and over the weekend we will organize, pack and load this household into a truck to be shipped to the Valley of the Sun. Considering how every day felt like a year, it really has flown by. We've had our moments (leaving The Lorax early, and busting out of Olive Garden last night - come to mind), and we've been whiny, clingy, crabby, loud and silly, but we've survived. Whew. This Momma is tired. 


My thought this week was taper. Instead I've run 3 miles every day just to burn off the anxiety and stress of the move. Wisconsin has shed its winter coat and the weather is outrageous for March. My body is in shock. Last week I ran my practice 13.1 in 20 degrees. If I run it tomorrow (and I am putting that big IF out there cause frankly it might not happen), it will be close to 50 degrees warmer.My struggles with this warming trend is troubling considering what I will be faced with in the near term. I'm feeling rather overwhelmed but just trying to take it all one day at a time. Right now, I am running with Doubt. Argh.

3. What to Wear?

Not only has the weather screwed with my internal temperature controls but now I have no idea what to WEAR to run. Having gained back a couple of pounds, in these new summer like running clothes everything is jiggling and I am feeling TOTALLY exposed. Not pretty. I've forgotten what it feels like to just put it out there. I like the comfort of head to toe compression coverings dressed up with cute little jackets, hats with pony tail holes, etc. I've had at least two weeks this week where I've had to stop, retie the draw string, yank on the shirt... why are all these shirts soo short? What do you wear to run in the sun?

I have found new love for my new Aspaeris shorts. these are nice. No muffin top and they are keeping the jiggles at bay. Bonus, they make my quads feel like they are getting a massage. Sweet! Thanks Aspaeris!!

See how nice I look in them? Yeah, no.... I wish.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Panic (Week 16 Training Recap)

Finis. Finished. Done. This is it folks. The last week of training. The 16 week plan. Now, I've got to move across the country. Cue The Smiths - PANIC!

oh this picture is not flattering!
I ran a practice 13.1 on Friday to cap off the training, and I'm "tapering" this week to run Eddy's Half on Friday. It all went a bit pear-shaped (fav British saying) at the end, but I am seeing the end, so I'm proud. I've proved to myself that I am more than just a casual runner. I'm more than a girl that can lose weight.  I can train like an athlete and run distances I wouldn't have even considered even walking two years ago.

Week 16 in Review:

 Count: 5 Activities
 Distance: 31.40 mi
 Time: 5:29:10 h:m:s
 Elevation Gain: 1,036 ft
 Avg Speed: 5.7 mph
 Avg HR: 150 bpm
 Calories: 3,906 C

Things are going to go a bit differently here for the new few weeks. My life is going thru total upheaval with our cross country move. I've hit the panic mode today and I have literally started tearing my house apart. It is all going to get a little bit crazy before it gets back to normal again. And that's ok, crazy is fun... but crazy might not lend itself to the OCD blog entries I have maintained in the last few years.

So, I might go silent, I might go off topic, but I'll be back. I've signed up the the Jelly Bean in April so I'll be running again in just a few weeks. In a few weeks, I'll never believe that I was capable of running 30 miles a week. Gotta write this stuff down to even believe its true!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Join me for the Jelly Bean!

Run With Jess is hosting a fun virtual race. Seeing as I am feeling a bit lost at the moment about where I currently live - I figured a virtual race is about my speed! Looks like a lot of fun!

Here's the scoop from the official entry site:

Celebrate Spring by racing with me in the 
2nd annual Jelly Bean virtual race!

What's a virtual race?  A virtual race is running a specified distance (timed) without being present in the actual race location.

DATE:  Anytime during Easter week, April 1-8, 2012 (Sunday-to-Sunday)

LOCATION:  Pick your favorite local route or just hop on a treadmill.

EVENTS:  Choose the event that works best for your current fitness level.
- Run 5K (3.1 miles)
- Run 10K  (6.2 miles)
- Run Half-Marathon (13.1 miles)
- Bike 21K (13 miles)
You may participate in more than one event. Earn 1 point for each event completed.

Local Peoria participants, please RSVP here.

RESULTS: Report your final race time(s) no later than Tuesday, April 10 at 12:00 noon CST. This is a fun race; no Garmin/treadmill photo required to verify your time.  No reason to cheat your time; prizes are all random.  Input your time on the spreadsheet or e-mail it to

PRIZES:  By participating, you earn points into the raffle drawing to win prizes from the Jelly Bean's great sponsors.
    1pt - Submit your final race time
    1pt - Submit a photo from your Jelly Bean race *
    1pt - Your photo contains a friend!  Encourage someone else to run!
    2pts - Wear one of the new "Heart & Sole" shirts available here

Official shirt of the 2012 Jelly Bean
Short-sleeve -OR- Sleeveless

* Prize for Best Photo/Costume... If you know me, I love fun costumes and I love photos! So there will be a special prize pack for my favorite photo!! 

Go sign up! Its free! You can't lose! I signed up for the 5K, 10K and Half (although this might be a stretch for me in the HEAT, but I'm gonna try!)

Thursday, March 8, 2012

3 Things Thursday - Mojo, finishing, Eddy's Half

1. Mojo. Life is a Marathon, so pace yourself. I'm still dealing with a lot of frustration related to the wimpy end to my half marathon training. I'm fizzling out and although I'm trying real hard to forgive myself for it (life happens), I still feel blah... just blah. Its ok. I know it is. I know that life happening is more important right now. But I've lost my mojo and I'm suffering. I've got to remember, life is a marathon. Pace yourself Eddy.

2. Finishing. "Real achievement comes from racing ahead when no one else sees the path." My husband has been a fan of Seth's Blog for a while and I can see why. Click the link and see what a short, concise, and motivational blog can be.

They say, run your own race. So I'm going to. Next Friday. My own half "mara"-thon. 13.1 miles of running with this big dino chasing me -I've got to finish this.

3. Eddy's half. I've mapped it out. I'm going to try to finish this one next Friday as a celebration of running in Wisconsin. Finishing my own race. Seeing the training thru to the end. I'll report back, promise. So, if you see some crazy girl out there with a racing bib on and no one else around here, just know she's running her own race...

Here's the route:

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